2022 Season Match Reports

In a game of remarkable swings, Salix posted 258 before reducing Flamstead to 0 for 2 in the very first over, only for the Flamstead captain to single-handedly drag his side back into contention with a stunning century. It took the calm, clinical brilliance of CK — with the ball, in the field, and in the mind — to finally put the game to bed. A victory that will live long in the memory.

£70. Seventy British pounds. Seventy Pounds Sterling. It can buy you numerous things. For example; a few rounds on a boozy night out with your mates, lunch for 1 at many of London’s acclaimed Michelin Star Restaurants or as Salix CC found out for the second week in a row; a day’s hire of a council cricket pitch at Wandsworth Common.

Salix CC, after winning the toss, opted to bat first, but the decision proved challenging as they were restricted to a modest total of 139. Early breakthroughs from Gents CC’s bowlers set the tone for the innings, as the Salix batsmen struggled to build partnerships.

And so we come again to the not infrequent occurrence of a Salix captain pacing the boundary, concern etched across his face, a gait familiar to those who have previously fouled their own underwear before the night has ended: the walk of a man who knows he may pick up the ultimate Salix accolade of presiding over the lowest team score in the club’s history.

Rendezvous time was ten-to-twelve. Location. Sir Geoff’s house. Memorandum; Don’t Be Late. As I pulled up to Sir Geoff’s house for 11.50am, Chetan (nickname pending) was nowhere to be seen. At precisely 12pm, we decided to politely enquire as to the whereabouts of Mr Chetan Shetty.

The 2025 season began, as many have before, in the picturesque village of Islip – one of our longest-standing fixtures. Earlier in the week, temperatures had soared to 27°C, but in typical bank holiday fashion, they dropped sharply by match day. Half the team was found rummaging through cricket bags (likely untouched since last season) in search of as many layers as possible.

Well what a week! England make it to the final of the Euros; England’s cricketers wish farewell to Jimmy with a resounding thrashing of the Windies (in 2 days and 1 session robbing the Day 4 ticket holders of their enjoyment but I’m not bitter) and yet… England lose consecutive Euros finals and Salix lose 10 in a row to the Whalers; twas ever thus…

What is the collective name for consecutive shellackings? Is it a Salix? When reading last week’s match report did the team, on reading the first sentence, detect a note of disappointment in Elvis’s tone, and collectively think “OK, we didn’t quite deliver a proper shellacking, we’ll get it right next time.”